Meditation can look all peaceful, beautiful, and serene from the outside. For me it is more like handing my broken being over to God, again.
Life, or my life anyway, has a way of chewing me up and spitting me out sometimes. The Life steamroller flattens me. (You can substitute your own favorite metaphors here, like hammer, jackhammer, etc.) The sucker gets me with an unexpected gut punch.
Right then I do not need to be told I am a nice guy, or sweet, or good. Right then I need to remember I am not special. Everybody gets the gut punch, and way more often than we want. Life specializes in such sucker punches, and too many of them come as great tragedy.
When the sucker punch busts my ego, I need to know I belong with the rest of the wounded warriors who face what we face each day. And I need to remember we are all in the care of God, no matter what has happened.
Meditation is more like falling down into that discovery again this day.
In the final day of an amazing writer’s workshop I learned that my first publisher was a kind of “vanity house,” a place that publishes books for people who will pay good money just to get our work published. I had believed otherwise, and now I know. Sucker punch to the gut. Busted ego, again.
So right now, while the sting is fresh, this little wound must be brought into God’s good care. Right now it is time to sit in meditation, to bring this busted ego into the center of being. I must sit alongside brokenhearted people: my friend whose eight month-old granddaughter died today, and my friend whose wife died from cancer this month, and my friend whose son’s addiction threatens his life every single day. Our broken hearts belong together.
Today I will sit beside wounded souls who attempted suicide, or lost a child to suicide, or whose son went to prison. I will sit with the lonely friends, and the street friends, and the ones for whom life is just getting better this day. They might be sitting in other places, but my sitting is with them all. My busted ego belongs with these friends. For we are all in God’s good care, and needing to remember this today.
Meditation is for a busted ego, and a broken heart, and a wounded soul. Which means meditation is for us all. Meditation might look all peaceful from the outside. But do not be fooled. On the inside we are handing our broken beings over to God, again.
[If this little story would help a friend, pass it along. It is free].